The Dawn of A New Season

Irrelevant image 

The end of summer is upon us. With this end comes the end of freedom, fun, sloth and germans. But this sad day will bring more work for me and more posts for you to read. So to put it short: I'm starting a new season for my blog just like a new season for tv and stuff like that. Hopefully my posts will be more frequent , like one or two a weak. There are going to me more new movies, some that you should have heard (so that I would not look like some sort of a hipster ). But you know, it all depends, if I get enough motivation from followers and comments, there could be more posts and more of things you like to read about, just don't be shy to say what you want.So just to let you know.....

look at this happy little f*ck

Here's a short list of movies that will appear on this blog :
M (1931)
Solaris (1972)
The Mirror (1975)
Stalker (1979)
Heavens Gate (1980)
A Nightmare on Elms street (1984)

What is this doing here ?

Platoon (1986)
Silence of the Lambs (1991)
The Last of the Mohicans (1992)
Schindler's List (1993)
Twelve Monkeys (1995)
Last Man Standing (1996)
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998)
Memento (2000)
City of God (2002)
Equilibrium (2002)
Sum of all Fears (2002)
Constantine (2005)
Pan's Labyrinth (2006)
Atonement (2007)
Elite Squad (2007)
The Wrestler (2008)
Black Swan (2011)






Surely there are many more to come, but I'm to lazy to name them all (pokemon) . This list does not state the order of  posts or flavor of my soup. If you see something that you would love to read form the list, just say so, if you don't see the name of your favorite movie, just tell me,if you have a cow, just make some soup, everything is simple with OldSpice.
So wish me luck on to the new era of this blog (wow... i really know how to make things sound important) 

Orgazmo (1997)

 you're probably asking "why in the name of all that is orange juice did you, Jazz, chose this stupid this for a review when there are so many good movies to review? " Well that is a good question there my friend.

Wow.... so much of wasted space up there.... Anywho... To answer your question: it was my friend. He told me to do some comedy, i said "Ok how about the circus (1928) ?" no, he said , you need something great like this . Something i found in my left testicle.
 So i listened to the little guy, pat him on the back , with a "Nice story Mark" and hoped for the best.
All i have to say, is that it was funny in some points, but not a great comedy. Sure it had that fun randomness witch is great, but it was stupid as back of my hand. actually , that is why i hate reviewing comedies, the are either funny or not, that is all. And this one... well... the trailer is funnier that the whole movie in general. 

ps. to my bud: nice........ note to never do it again.

Donnie Darko (2001)

Lets just say I love watching movies with my dad, because he know's some good ones. I like brain fuckers twisters myself , so it looked like a great idea to watch a movie that is about a man that is crazy, but may not be crazy, but sort off is crazy , but sees a bunny , that tells him to do things , like all the other kids I know.

Donnie is , lets just put it , special little boy. Because calling him a butt-crazy-arsonist-killer-whanker would be more or less rude. Jake Gyllenhaal made this nut-job look really realistic and believable, unlike some other actors in the movie, who were just plain "no" to me. On the course of the movie there were nice lines said , some that could be philosophical or just smart-ass to say near your friends so that you would look deep. Even that one that you're seeing on the poster on the left "why are you wearing that stupid man suit? " that would make you think for ever and all that. If anyone says that to you just say " sorry, not everyone like my God of Thunder looks" and punch then in the face for trying to act deep. On the good side , there are some nice ironic jokes about education and educational movies, and thank Sean Connery that they are not so obvious.
  Donnie Darko (2001) does have that brain turning thing, but not only that. Also it has them moments when that is just a fun family show , some romance , some jokes, some sadness and all that. Gives it more that just brain bashing would give.

I don't think I have much more to say, more or less it is good. Has something that you might not enjoy, but mostly is some good watchin' and that is all.
The ending is still not so clear to me, yet I enjoy the fact that every little crappy line was not forgoten and in the end everything comes togerther and something something, still not so sure what happens, still don't understand if he was sane or so crazy that he traveled time, but maybe I just need a good night sleep till I figure it all out.

Once Upon a Time in the West (1968)

So somebody said that I post not enough posts, well, that's because I'm a lazy lion. Get it ? Good.
Now, for those who are still waiting for a review: I don't really say that very often, but when I do , I mean it, and this is probably the best. Best western, I have ever seen.

 C'era una volta il West (1968) has everything needed for a good western. Characters are like they should be: there's a good guy, who is misterious and a good shot, there's a bad guy, who's laughing at the face of danger and can't be gunned down by anyone, and there's a bad guy, who does good and he's sort of a good-bad guy that you love to hate. Glad to make that clear. Just as a side note , that is really similar to The Good The Bad and The Ugly, just here we have more emotional deaths, sometimes you really don't want some guys to die. It really plays on you, even thou some bad guys are as evil as Jehovah's witnesses , you still go "baw" when they kick the bucket. One more thing for the characters is that every one says something meaningful and fairly smart. And I really enjoy when there is also something to learn from movies, not just waste time on pretty pictures. And oh my, these pictures are pretty indeed sir. The way the camera goes, all the angles that it shows and all the dirtiness that makes things realistic, all sum up in a breath taking and putting it back to you form the wrong end movie.

 This ladies and not so ladies, is Charles Bronson , know as Harmonica in the movie. Why ? Well Watson, that's because he plays his harmonica. And that is some songs of death that he plays, because when he plays them, you stop breathing and start waiting for something to happen. That music he plays builds so much tension that your mind gets blown apart , put in a bag, sent to mars and reassembled there . And Charles handles his harmonica very well indeed. He's here to fock everything up, just because he needs to set some old scores. So if you're thinking of choosing your next hero in show and tell back in class, the you better choose this bad-ass good guy.

 Damn... there is still so much that I would like to say but might not find the right words for this masterpiece of westerns. You really have to see this for your self, for I can't explain how epic everything goes, how amazing bad guys walk down the desert , how stunning does it feel to see every twist in the story that takes you in and doesn't let go. I don't even have the right words to state the good old mano-a-mano that takes place, and puts the finishing strokes on the roll of little paintings that all together are called C'era una volta il West , the Italian comeback for every western in America.






This post looks alot better thanks to Steve from College Downtime and I would be glad that if you liked what you red here you would visit him as well.

Silk 2007

I know what your thinking now. " What did is this new movie doing here ?" and i can simply answer that : that because i had to see a movie with my mom, and that's what she picked and i could do nothing about it, but i just thought, that if i'm watching this anyway, then why not write about it .
    first thing you might notice is the off screen voincing, wich i like so muchi had to mention here, nothing facy about it thou. pitty if you ask me. Puting a voice behind the actual picture is one of few weapons that a director can use to occupy the hearts of his viewers, and in silk it was use just so that it would be used.
The picture it self is buitiflue, all the japanese locations, all macro shots on those bug thingies, truly stunning. Also, breath taking. literally, i slowed down my breathing just so i could hear everything that is going on. Thou from the visual point, there was a lack of mace-up used. The point that after 10 or more years they look the same helps me not to believe it as reality and accept it just as a movie and nothing more.
Dont want to be rude and all, dont want to say that this movie is bad or anything, but, i might just be me, i seems that this movie is slow , draggy, and not worth the time seeing it, i do recommend reading it. AS in the book, not as in binary code or something.

Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory (1971)

Yeah, the old one. Just thought I should see the original to know who's better.
And here the part where I compare those two fudge-cakes :
Before the movie, the biggest question for me was "what did they change in Tim Burtons version of this" and sadly I can't point out many things. Almost every twist there was, almost every trap and surprise was the same. All thou they did change ducks into squirrels, but the plot was more or less point to point the same, and that is not really fun. If you're doing a remake, then please at least change the major twist, so then every one would go "holly fresh potatoes, i thought there will be a different ending, you got me entertained sir." Now all those who saw any version could save time and not see the other.
 Tim did make it his own way thou, really "Burtish" if you ask me, and that's somewhat what the original was missing. Creepy-weird-what style. And that's where Johnny Depp fits in very well. Making a great view, but the music was better in the original. See ? You win some , you lose some. The original has better ring to it, those songs were heard , and that shakes something deep inside you, making music more , you know... Close to you that the new one.
Sadly I'll have to say that if you saw one, you don't have to see the other, just a waste of time, so this time a remake is not better, nor worse, it's just made anew .

The Big Sleep (1946)

So I'm back on my track for old hits to hit you up. This here The Big Sleep (1946)  was recommended to me by my friend and I thing I own him a bucket of skittles for this one. A great detective here for all who like those.
 As it starts as some simple case of blackmailing it flips to murder, murder and even more murder. Fun, I know. First thing you might notice is the detective, the way he talks , the way he knows so much ( as it turns out not enough thou) and as he hits on the ladies. Humphrey Bogart did a great job on this one. Made one smart guy that talks non-stop and always knows whats going on, one step more that the rest of the world. To me, that looks like a real detective should act. Just for his character this movie is worth your time. And if that does not buy you in , hows about some helpful tips on getting girls ? Because , the way he does it is just amazing , I mean really, he even got the cab drivers (girl) number for no reason. And he got a lot of attention from every girl, and every single girl in there, the cab driver, the book store keeper, and every other , are smoking hot. Just a little less hot then the center of the sun.

 Also , this movie has some resemblance to other I have seen. Like Chinatown (1974) . Just when you think the case is closed, they spin everything around and make everything even worse that it began. What started as a blackmailing ended with five or six men dead. And happens so fast, it was hard to get with everything, all the names, all the thing they do, what is going on ? I was all like this cat here. Confus.
One way or the other, no matter how confused I got, I still enjoyed it till the end. This is one great detective, good for it's age, you don't have to be a crazy World War II hero to enjoy it, kick back, let them penetrate your mind.