Monday 31 October 2011

Shadows and Fog (1992)

Hello again to everyone, just to be clear, i do not celebrate Halloween so there will be nothing about that, and for those who think I should do a horror movie, because there is such thing as Halloween, then please be my guest and get some taste in movies why don't you.
It is great to be not so great.
Shadows and Fog (1992) by Woody Allen is what's for today. A killer is loose in the town and everyone is scared as hell, especially Klainman, yes you guest it, Woody him self. The killer kills on foggy nights. ( Happy now, you capitalistic candy loving freaks , who dress up as hookers and batman, are you happy now ? You disgust me ) 
Story seams to be confusing (like your costume) but it starts to unravel in time. It is fun to see how three different plots come together and end up in.... well.. i have no clue why did it end the way it did. I really don't. this is not a spoiler, probably , it all ends in the circus, and that is really strange, because the whole movie has nothing to do with it (more or less) so why circus, and why in the hell do you think that you look good in green tights ? You have no super powers, stop acting like a kid with mental illness you creep.
So the story is great, but that is not the only thing that makes a great film, you need someone who can pull of an act (not like you.. oh you get it ). 
Great cast, just great. What else can i say, there is John Malkovich , what else do you want ? You want more, sure you do , you love candy, and here's some candy :Mia Farrow, that's some eye candy. What ? you wanted chocolate ? Go steal some from little girls on the street, oh way, you do that every year.God help me I hate you.
 Good, now that we are clear on that, lets talk about the most important part that makes a film a good film. Yup, Woody Allen. Lets not lie (like your friends lie to you that your costume is good), and lets admit that he makes the whole movie worth watching. He is that one awkward guy who goes around not knowing a thing, but as it turns out, he is not as retarded as everyone else thou, like you and.. ok i should let it go.


This is great, i suggest watching it with friends, if you have any, unlike me. 

Happy Halloween to All
you sick freaks of nature 

Thursday 20 October 2011

Bananas (1971)

First of all, I am sorry for not writing for some time. I had a lot of work and didn't even have the time to scratch my ass. And that does not take too much time you know.But now I'm back, hopefully for some time. Another thing is , that one of my friends, who is an actual reviewer, viewed my scribbles and said that I use too much of personal opinion when reviewing.That made me wonder. Do you seriously take any of this nonsense seriously ? I mean i covered an entire paragraph about Nazis in my last "review", you can not take a guy who talks about Nazis seriously. Now , to make my point, Bananas (1971) by Woody Allen , is as ridiculous as I am.
It would be really hard to talk about anything made by Allen, because there is nothing new, everyone knows him and knows what his movies are about. So lets just pretend that you have never heard of a guy named Woody Allen.
So your common sense might be tingling and telling you that "this might be a comedy". Well, Einstein , guess what, you just one none million dolirs in a shape of geese.(See the joke is that Einstein is actually dead). But yes, this is a comedy, and as I see it, it is a stereotypical comedy for it's time. Jokes are often random, and the randomness makes them funny. Thou in the end , many jokes fail to make the same impact as you get used to them. Many serious matters are discussed in Bananas from an angle of absurdity. It is as if the whole world just does not see the stupidity of many acts. And not only serious things like politics or death are made fun of, the little things, the way we eat, the way people try to be fit, advertisements, everything is a laughing matter here.

This stupidity is made casual. That makes it more funny than people laughing from their own jokes, but that is very common it comedies of that time, so that is why I can't say that this is something remarkably great and unique. It is funny, to a certain point. It is good to watch. Even the plot makes sense more or less. But it is not a god of comedy. Now if, lets just say, i would remember that this is by Allen, then HOLLY MOTHER OF KAMOLLY , THIS IS DAS BEST COMEDY EVER, I SHAT MY CATS LITTER BOX OUT OF LAUGHTER. But let's be fair and not judge a movie by it's credits. Allen is good, but for some unknown reasons he is not my personal God and will never be. Sorry Allen fans.

Now when it comes to Allen... You have to have sex. The importance of sex is highly escalated in every movie by Woody Allen, this one is no different . Actually the main plot revolves about sex, but for to anyone who has seen any of his works that is nothing new.
Now to finish this all up, there is one thing that came to my mind while watching this. Bananas is like the internet in film form. Sex, randomness is there and there is nothing saint , that could not be made fun of.
Enjoy.
Also, i could make a whole series of Woody Allen works, so don't forget to vote. Why ? Why not ?